The Past

You ever have one of those moments where your mind wanders and you think about a moment in the past...you're not bitter. You're not sad or upset or angry. You just think about a situation you were in, and it's like "What the fuck was I thinking?" And then you just want to vent about the situation to someone? No one in particular. You don't want to bad mouth yourself or beat yourself up. You just have to verbalize the stupidity. Yea, I had one of those moments like 10 minutes ago. I was stepping out of the shower. The glass on the mirrors was fogged up, and it's too cold in my house to open the door and let all that nice steamy shower heat out. So, I was just kind of forced to stand there and wait for the mirrors to clear. Then, I can get ready for my show. Put my make up on and fix my hair and whatnot. I started thinking about one of my ex-boyfriends, and what a TOTAL moron he was, and what the hell was I thinking to go against everything in my gut to fall in love with this guy? I am in an amazing relationship now that's filled with love and openness and we never ever fight, and he's cute and charming and loves me and takes good care of me when I'm sick, and I just thought about what a volatile nightmare my ex was. How he would set up these absolutely horrible situations where I just couldn't win even if I wanted to. Yet he did not see these actions as clear self sabotage. Is this why self-sabotagers do this? Because they can't see it? It was so clear to me, yet he would enroll me into getting confused when the situation was clear. The most annoying one was his ex-boss. He hated her. At the time, he hated his job and would complain CONSTANTLY about how much he hated it and how much he hated his boss. He would say she was controlling and a huge bitch, and he would say how jealous she was of our relationship. He also said she would badmouth me, and she didn't like me. I don't think he ever said one positive thing about that job or his ex-boss. I had NO point of reference except to encourage him to quit that job because all he would do was bad mouth it 24/7. When I would encourage him to take action towards um...being HAPPY by getting another job, he would then accuse me of trying to sabotage him! I think back at this, and ask myself, "Rosie, why the hell would you allow this obvious insanity to go on?" This guy was a nutjob! I could go on and on, but the only person who can take responsibility is me. Why the hell didn't I get out of there? Geez! What a total waste of time. There are only a few minor positive things I learned from that relationship. The most important one being to TRUST MY GUT. If I feel like the guy's beliefs or actions don't make any sense in most of his daily life, RUN. Self-sabotagers have very low self-esteem and they will take you down with them. The hilarious and sad thing is that when you hear his "perspective" about our relationship, it is totally delusional and off key. He believes, to this day, I would "sabotage" him. Any person with their head on straight could go play by play in our relationship and see clear as day that he would sabotage himself. In fact, we went to a couple's counselor, and she actually pulled me aside one day and told me that she thought he was a complete whack job, and I needed to get away from him fast! She said she saw this all the time, and it was really hard for her to be "neutral" when she saw that one person was clearly causing most of the issues, but that she couldn't be "sided" or the other person would not be interested in continuing couples counseling if they felt their "side" wasn't being heard. That is complete bs, if you ask me and sad! If someone is causing most of the problems, they should be confronted by the third party. Sometimes people are so brainwashed into thinking they are "right" that they need someone else to smack some sense into them because they are too proud to listen to their partner. I just wish she would have told me what she REALLY thought the first day in there. So, I could have not wasted several months of my hard earned money on counseling. She said she knew he was off the first few sessions by some of his warning sign behaviors. Well, share those with me please! Well, lesson learned, Rosie. You have the power to RUN from psychos. I can't blame him. He was just being himself! I had the power of knowledge and obligation. The person who is more sane has the obligation to dictate the situation. I like my relationship now where I have a responsible guy, and I get to be the crazy, unstable artist! I didn't like "taking care" of a psycho. I like being the psycho! =) Yay! For my normal and healthy boyfriend!

Precious: WARNING Spoiler Alert

Just saw "Precious" last night. Couple things, first of all ANTI-CLIMATIC ending, as far as I'm concerned! We're supposed to be happy Precious is free from her mom (played by Monique)? She's HIV positive, has two kids she can't take care of, and don't know what she's gonna do next? Yea, she got some tiny bit of self-esteem by the end of the movie but damn...sad ending that was supposed to be "uplifting"... Also, Monique look bad. I know they were trying to make her look bad, but I don't think they were trying that hard. It seriously looked like that's what she naturally looks like with no make up. It doesn't look like they put fake make up on her to make her "look bad". I think she just look bad. They were probably like, "Ok Monique, just come to set the way you look when you wake up." Another thing, when the characters in the movie were talking about "everyone watches Oprah." Oprah is executive producer of the film. Way to plug yourself shamelessly in your own film. Wow, talk about product placement. I can imagine Oprah in the shoot meetings, "Even kids in the ghetto in the late '80's were watching me! I'm soo amazing." Mariah Carey was supposed to be her welfare counselor for a year, but she's only in two scenes? They could have had one or two more scenes so we know about TIME PROGRESSION. Finally, the small "alternative" class Precious was in only had like six ethnic girls, then in one random scene the producers put in some random white girl to make a joke about Precious' incest, and then this character is NEVER seen again. The movie was very good, funny, and cute, but the issues with it were glaring and obvious and kind of hilarious. Like when Mariah Carey is like, "I've been your counselor for a year now..." and you're literally like WTF? A Year? You were only in ONE scene like WAY in the beginning of the film? I can see why the film did well at Sundance though. It was emotional and the lead character is unlikely, but damn the film nasty. Showing Precious breast feeding her baby and way TMI in the sex scene. They don't "show" a lot, but her dad's sweaty, hairy belly and moaning noises were presented in a way that was way nasty. Also, a lot of nasty fried chicken, where they zoomed in on the oil. Think they were trying to make the film look "gritty" but it just looked nasty. Overall, a good film. I would recommend you watch it, but I personally wouldn't watch it again. Mariah Carey's New York accent was also kind of fake and annoying. Wish they would have either gone ALL out and made the ending super sad/tragic/profound or actually had a REAL happy ending where our protagonist doesn't have AIDS. Jesus Christ. How depressing...

Spanksgiving

Just got back from Indiana, visiting my beau's family. It was fun, learned a lot about him...mostly that his house is super 70's looking. My house used to look like that, but worse. My parents had the deep wood panels on the wall and orange linoleum floors with a fridge that literally would stick closed, and you'd have to pry it open. My dad was SO attached to those ugly wood panels, when we went to re-do the house, he wouldn't let the contractor take it down. Normally, they just tear and down and it's fine. That's it. My dad had them DRYWALL OVER the wood panels. In case the panels ever came back in, we could tear down the drywall. Wow. That is sad, daddy. He really loved those ugly panels? Indiana kinda sucked weather-wise because I was hoping to see some damn snow! All these people from the midwest always talking smack about how L.A. doesn't have no seasons, and I go up there and it felt EXACTLY like L.A. except dreary. I was like WTF? Where is my snow mothafuckas???? Woke up in the middle of the night last night to my little doggy, Mitzy barfing. That was nice, then I stepped in it. That was nicer. This always happens when I put up nice Christmas decorations. She suddenly is all sick and sometimes poops on the Christmas tree base skirt. It's so pretty. It has a pic of santa on it. It's like the LAST thing I want poop on. OMG my house is soo cute for the holidays. I have pet stalkings up, a tree with lights and bulbs, and lights on my bushes with a wreath. I listen to the country stations heavy this time of year b/c they are the only L.A. stations that play the hardcore Christmas music. Screw "Happy Holidays", it's Christmas! I'm not even Christian, and it's Christmas. This has nothing to do with religion, it's just more FUN to sing Christmas songs and get a tree and be festive. I was humming Christmas songs all day yesterday!! Went to Target to stock up on scented pine cones. OHHH HELL YEA! Those are the BEST. Did a show, took my man out on the town, decorated my house, ate chocolate! This is the time of year to gain 5 or 6 pounds. So, you can feel bad about yourself in that slinky New Year's eve dress...Ok, gonna check on my sick pooch...

Why Women Why???

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Saturday

I have a show Saturday at the Spotlight Comedy Club in Studio City, CA. I will be hosting the show! I think we start at 8pm. Come out laugh, buy my Rosie Tran Cookies, and give me a hug! xoxo

15th Ward, Represent, baby! Geaux Saints!

This posting has nothing to do with sports. I'm just proud of my team. Undefeated, baby! Ok, I just came to the conclusion that if I was still living in New Orleans, I would be about 20-30 lbs overweight by now. (Sorry friends from New Orleans.) But a lot of people I have seen (thru facebook) have gained so much weight! I have gained like 10 lbs, and I live in health-conscious L.A.!!! I have a major sugar habit, and I also love eating fried Southern food, but thanks to my location, it's REALLY hard to find good fried Southern food. There is a place in the Valley, that is supposed to be "cajun", but I went there and got food poisoning! I also have been to more black areas like Compton and South Central looking for good home cooking, but it's just not right. I do stand up sometimes at the "Family Room" in South L.A. and they have fried chicken that is pretty close. The former owner (RIP) was from Baton Rouge, LA. So, it was kinda close, but really hard to find good stuff. Although I meet a LOT of black folk who are out here that have relatives from Louisiana. So, something is going on, but still the food is not right. So, thankfully I stay kind of skinny, but man I love fried Southern food soo much. It is soo yummy and delicious. Also, for some reason the Asian food is better. You'd think with all the Asians here, there would be some good places, but it's pretty bad. They have REALLY good Korean, Japanese, and Thai food in L.A. but no Vietnamese/Chinese. Even my friend Jackie, who's from the Bay Area and Viet made a comment, "They just don't do it right!" I don't know what it is, but it is really bad up here. I have been to SOOO many Chinese and Viet places. I know everyone says to go to Orange County, but hey! Los Angeles is one of the biggest cities in the U.S., you would think they would have some yummy places. Usually, I have to drive to my old 'hood (Monterey Park) to get some good grub. Although, I still think Sam Woo (Van Nuys) is delicious! Mmm...their roast peking duck is soo fatty and good. The worst is when I can cook it better at home than at the restaurant! Hey! I want a night off? I don't want to cook, that's why I am going out to eat!!! That's the problem when you grew up in a FOODIE CITY and your parents are also both food snobs! You get spoiled!!! I am spoiled in TWO cultures!!! That's not good. Here's the thing with L.A., a lot of people are about hype, not the food. It's atmosphere or if celebrities are going there. I just want yummy. I don't care. Here are SOME places I like and why or what....

Sam Woo- Mmm...cheap and delicious. Decent beef chow mein and yummy, salty, fatty duck!

Uncle Andre's- OMG closest to Southern cooking so far. Horrible, slow service, but it's WORTH IT.

Sanamaluang- My ex took me here, and I hated it at first, but then I realized how DAMN hard it was to find an authentic thai place! Cheap, yummy, authentic. Oh! And opens super late. 

Noodle Planet or Noodle World- Good places for cheap, generic, but authentic Asian food. They are two, different, and competing companies but similar, and both good. Here is the rule of thumb on noodles, if they use Spaghetti style chow or low mein noodles, RUN AWAY!!! It's Americanized garbage, and it's NOT authentic. 

Noodle City- For Vietnamese, the egg rolls are really good. The Pho is just ok. 

I am still trying to find a good seafood place. Trust me, people, I eat A LOT and at a lot of different places. I am a true foodie for life! So, I keep my eyes peeled and my tummy growling for more at all turns. I promise you, I will find yummy places and pass more info along. Until then, don't be fooled by fake Asian places! They trick you!!! One time I went to a Chinese restaurant and asked for a specific dish. The owner (who was also waiting tables) started LAUGHING at me. He was like, "White people don't know how to eat that!" And he walked away. White people can be open minded foodies, too! You have to have an authentic menu. Otherwise, why wouldn't someone just go to Panda Express? Authentic, fresh ingredients is key!!!!

OMG Tired

OMG I am so tired. I went out last night for Halloween. First we went to Echo Park to this restaurant, MASA. It was Chicago-style deep dish, which I am sorry to say is gross. I hate when something is popular in a region, and people get really defensive about how wonderful it is just because it represents their childhood or some other thing related to that reason. Look, I'm from New Orleans and there is some amazing food there, but I am honest enough with myself to know that not all Cajun cuisine is for everyone, and I am also smart enough to know that just because something is from my childhood memories, doesn't mean it is the most amazing thing in the World. I have NEVER had a good Chicago style deep dish pizza, and I have had it in a bunch of restaurants actually in Chicago where people were like, "OMG this is amazing, you have to try this is famous blah blah blah." Look the pizza is way too bready and overbearing. I can only have like two bites and I feel full/sick. That is not a sign of a good dish. People in the midwest are brainwashed to think that this type of pizza is actually yummy. So, that they can feel proud about their upbringing. The truth is, it's horrible. Chicago thin crust, however, is delicious. If you wanna try a good Chicago-style thin crust place in L.A., try:

Casa Bianca in Eagle Rock. 

I'm sure there are tons of delicious foods from the midwest, but Chicago style deep dish pizza is NOT one of them. Not only is it horrible and too heavy, it's really unhealthy but not in a good way. Some things are REALLY unhealthy, but in a good way...like doughnuts or anything deep fried with good batter. Eating heavy bread is not my idea of delicious, nor should any foodie fall for this brainwashing. I like when people take their blind ideologies and put them aside for honesty. The BEST was when my friend George, who was BORN AND RAISED in Manhattan, admitted that New York pizza is disgusting. I wanted to jump up and kiss him. Every other New Yorker is so brainwashed with pride, they don't realize what they are saying. He said that the better Pizza was in the boroughs, and the NY pizza was made too cheaply with poor ingredients. This is something I totally agreed with, but didn't want to be beaten and murdered by an angry NY-er. I am not saying that NY style pizza is disgusting. I think NY style pizza is some of the best pizza ever. But a lot of pizza places in NY you can tell the ingredients are really cheap, and I don't wanna hear a lecture about how I probably didn't go to the right place, because I've been to NY a LOT and been to a lot of "this is the best pizza place you gotta try it" and guess what? It all tasted like cheap pizza. Cheap dough, cheap cheese, and meat. The key to any recipe, wherever you live, is quality ingredients...except Chicago style deep dish. There are NO ingredients that could make this heavy bread dish taste good to me. Ok, anyways, I went off on a tangent. Ok, so Andrew and I went there because his friend, Matt, is moving, and it was a going away dinner. Echo park was very cute for Halloween. There were a lot of kids there, and we saw some really cute costumes on some little ones. Then, we headed to a house party in Tarzana. I have to say, I had a lot of fun, but was slightly disappointed by the term "mansion" that his friends had thrown around. Andrew and his friends were referring to this party as being at a "mansion" in Tarzana. Ok, I don't own a house, but this was just a normal house. No "mansion" needed. Other than that, it was fun. We danced, ate tons of sugar, and got to see some really cool costumes. I woke up and was tired/confused because of the time change. 

Oh! I have a show tomorrow night (Monday) at the Jon Lovitz Comedy Club. If you guys can make it. Here is the event invite.

Click Here.

America...industrial giant behind the times...

Why don't we have these in America yet?

Magnetic Trains

Argh!!!

America vs. Japan! Battle!

I spend some time looking at Asian porn online. The reason for this is 1) I'm curious and 2) I wanna see how my body stacks up to other Asian chicks. Ok, the second reason is total body image issues/ego. Not good ego, either. If there is good ego. Here are my thoughts on Asian porn. Asian-American porn girls suck. They are not pretty at all. They are pretty by white boy standards because a lot of white people think Asians all look alike. (A lot don't.) But the Asian chicks are really not attractive at all. They are really super ghetto actually. However, the guys are ok. Usually they use white/black guys that are ok. If you want REALLY super pretty girls, you look at REAL Asian porn made by Japanese companies. Oh my freakin' gosh! These girls are SOO amazing. They are literally model quality and not super lanky, skinny model types. They are gorgeous, beautiful, perfect skin, flawless, super young looking! I don't know what they are doing in Asia, but these girls are soo beautiful, I'm wondering why they are even in the business?! However, the guys in real Asian porn are disgusting. They are all fat, old-looking Japanese businessmen with really hairy bush. It's pretty nasty. Southeast Asian porn is really really dirty, but the girls are not that hot, and I feel sick/guilty when I look at it because it looks so illegal, like it's run by the Mafia or something and the girls literally look like sex slaves. So, even though it's really hot. I know that even clicking on the webpage, I'm supporting some sort of human or drug trafficking. Please try not to support it. It looks really illegal and inhumane. I know in America, it's hard for us to think of human "slavery" and you may try to justify it, like "Oh, they're adults, they know what they're doing." That may be true in the States, but overseas, you really never know. It's shady as hell...So...how to make the perfect porn? Use American male pornstars and import hot Asian babes! You don't know what you're missing, if you haven't seen these Japanese hotties!! These are my thoughts on this. 

What's up funk-a-delic?!

A lot of you know that I took a transformational training over the past 5 months. It was totally amazing, exactly what I had been looking for in my life! It was very positive thought/the "secret" type stuff. I have been in therapy for about...I can't even remember...maybe 3 years? Maybe 4? Not sure. Anyways, the progress that I made in the trainings really was accelerated versus traditional therapy. My therapist described it as "cognitive re-structuring." I don't know what it is, but it worked. Well, now that I have ALL these tools to apply towards my life, it's a little overwhelming. I'm like, "Oh crap, you mean I can't blame people anymore for shit that goes wrong?" Here's the thing, the reason most of us do all these unhealthy things like avoiding, shutting down, blaming others, etc etc etc is because there is a payoff. Sometimes, even though you know it's not healthy, it's just plain easier to blame the World for your problems instead of taking responsibility. So, now that I have the knowledge of responsibility, it's kind of hard to go back. Not that I was so crazy/wild/irresponsible before or anything, but now that I really know better...well, it's kind of like "seeing the light." I'm not sure of the exact story, but there is some metaphor or old tale about how this person is turned around looking at shadows on the wall their whole life and how their perception is all scary and then finally someone turns them around and they "see the light"/fire and then when you turn them back around, even if they never look at the light again, their perception of the shadows is different forever. Ok, that was a ramble, but that's what it is like. Now that I know what I have been doing in my life that wasn't working, it's really hard to go back to living that way of life. However, I haven't exactly figured out all this love/positive/responsibility life stuff yet completely. So, I'm in this limbo funk. It's not a fun place to be sometimes. I feel like I have several life purposes, but when the day doesn't always seem to be aligned with your life purpose, that's kind of weird too. Like, how come I'm not making a million bucks doing stand up? Don't answer that. I know the reasons, but you get my drift. If I'm taking responsibility for my life and the universe is supposed to align and all this stuff? Well? I don't get it! And then there's that idea that if you do what you love, then you don't need money to make you happy, and then don't get me started on all this abundance thought process stuff. That's a whole other cluster fuck. If you're living abundantly, then you have enough already, which I agree with. I have everything I need. I have a boyfriend who loves me, an amazing family, a great career, I have a place to live, food, two AMAZING pets. I get it! I get it! If this is true, then why the fuck do I want to make more money? Am I brainwashed by the media? I have everything I want, I feel fulfilled, yet...why? Why? Why? Ahh!!! I know, I'm not living in true abundance because I want more and that's ego and ego is bad and...ugh. Geez I'm so exhausted even thinking about it. Evil things like greed and want and desire are really powerful. Yea, sometimes I want a really nice car and a big mansion and a maid! Is that so bad and greedy? Why is it bad to have all these extravagant desires? So, that's the struggle I go through everyday. I know I have the most amazing life ever. I really do. But sometimes I play the lottery, and sometimes I want to be a millionaire and sit on my butt. And then sometimes I know that it's all big corporate marketing because I know people that are really rich and drive really nice cars and are really really successful in entertainment and they do a bunch of drugs and they're really empty and sad inside, and I know I don't want that. The nice cars aren't making them happy. They want what I have. They would kill to have a boyfriend that brings them flowers and takes them to Disneyland. They are so lonely! So I should be grateful, and I am, but then why do I want what they have, too? I don't want to switch. I don't want money and emptiness. I just want what I have now and a little more money. Universe? Can you just send me a couple more thousand bucks a month? That's really all I want. But why do I want the money? See, this blog could keep going on and on in circles. It just don't make a bit of sense, do it?

Oxnard Comedy

Hey Guys! I have a show tomorrow night in Oxnard! 9PM...Come out and support, please!

Myspace Blogger is Dead

Well, it's official. I've gotten sick of updating my blog on Rosietran.com, and well, myspace's blogger is dead...so, I've taken the leap to blogspot. I know, I'm a few years behind, but the myspace blog was serving me so well. Then, all of a sudden, it crapped out. I think it's not compatible with safari or something because it shows up when I use firefox, but I am so used to safari, and when I use safari the blog doesn't even show up on the screen. Screw you, myspace! I don't know what happened to myspace? It just suddenly got really really slow and crappy? I don't know if facebook stole all of their IT guys or something? But the technology on myspace is horrible. It's always frozen! Anyways, this is my new blog! So, please check here from now on. I will be updating frequently, since you KNOW how much I love to blog.